Hello Friend,
If you’ve found this blog, chances are you might be dealing with a difficult diagnosis, whether for yourself or a loved one. Welcome.
This website and the book it was created for–We Were Better Together–are both a labor of love and an act of service for me. In 2022, I lost my wife Melissa to cancer. We were married for thirty years, but we spent the last eight of those working to navigate her illness while still living a beautiful life together.
Neither of us had any idea what it was like to go through a journey such as the one we were embarking on. We had both had the good fortune to be healthy all our lives, and we had prioritized our health preventively, assembling a team of great doctors, eating well, exercising and regularly monitoring our progress even before Melissa’s diagnosis.
After we received the news, and as we began to walk that path together, we realized how much we didn’t know and how much there was to learn, one step at a time as we faced uncertainty, pain, frustration, sadness, and a deepening bond that came with the profoundness of our experience.
We were largely very successful, living well and keeping the cancer at bay for eight years. That is a long time considering that she was initially diagnosed at a late stage.
But still, despite the success we had for years, we ultimately lost our battle and she died. I was in the beginning stages of grieving when I decided to create this book. Working on it helped me so much as it kept me–and still keeps me–connected to her life and her memory. But just as importantly, I felt compelled to share all that we learned along the way with others who may be just starting out after a diagnosis, in the middle of their own journey, or who simply want to know more about the topic from a preventive standpoint to be better prepared for when and if something does arise.
The book features advice for every point along the journey of a serious illness, with things we learned, advice from top experts in the field, and letters that I wrote to Melissa after her passing. Take a look at this excerpt (link) or order your copy if you or someone you know could use the counsel of those who’ve been through it before.
With this blog, we’ll offer a variety of articles on dealing with illness as partners or within your family and how to have a better experience. I hope that something here will be helpful to you, and I’m sending you every wish for good health and true fulfillment.
Bob Shearer
